


Post Tenebras Lux

by thexstarsxabove



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Mentions of Violence, Minor Angst, Post-Series, adam deals with the aftermath of being literally possessed by a demon, and almost being forced to kill the love of his life, normal teenage stuff, so much tooth-rotting sweetness, you know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-17
Updated: 2018-05-17
Packaged: 2019-05-08 04:24:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14686422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thexstarsxabove/pseuds/thexstarsxabove
Summary: " Moonlight streamed through the window, bathing everything in bluish hues. The shadows of Ronan’s features only amplified in the lighting, making his edges look sharp like a blade.Dangerous.Beautiful.Adam studied him like a work of art.Like a God.From the curve of his lips to the way his throat bobbed when he swallowed. His gaze trailed over it all before halting on the ghastly bruises forming on his neck. Purple marks, yellowed around the edges like blossoms. A sight not unfamiliar to Adam himself, but making him feel ill nonetheless at seeing them on Ronan’s skin. Especially while knowing he was the one to have put them there.Old nightmares of him becoming just like his abusive father rose up in him like bile.Suddenly, he snapped his gaze away from the marks and into the dark blue of Ronan’s watchful gaze.He was studying him carefully. "





	Post Tenebras Lux

“  _ omnia bene erunt --  _

Everything will be okay. “

-

 

Moonlight streamed through the window, bathing everything in bluish hues. The shadows of Ronan’s features only amplified in the lighting, making his edges look sharp like a blade.

Dangerous. 

Beautiful.

Adam studied him like a work of art. 

Like a God.

From the curve of his lips to the way his throat bobbed when he swallowed. His gaze trailed over it all before halting on the ghastly bruises forming on his neck. Purple marks, yellowed around the edges like blossoms. A sight not unfamiliar to Adam himself, but making him feel ill nonetheless at seeing them on Ronan’s skin. Especially while knowing he was the one to have put them there.

Old nightmares of him becoming just like his abusive father rose up in him like bile.

Suddenly, he snapped his gaze away from the marks and into the dark blue of Ronan’s watchful gaze.

He was studying him carefully.

 

-

 

Ronan’s eyes flickered open the moment he felt cool fingers tracing along his neck. He hadn’t been quite sleeping, but teetering on the edge of it, right in the middle of crossing over into the dreamworld.

He blinked, turning his head to the side to find Adam with shaking hands and a crease between his eyebrows.

His touch was gentle, quivering and ready to pull back at any second- as if he were petting a dangerous animal. 

Reaching up, Ronan grabbed hold of Adam’s wrist to stop him, fingers firm but gentle against his thumping pulse.

“Don’t-” He started, watching the guilt spread in Adam’s gaze.

Adam’s eyes were still glued to the tender bruises.

“I don’t want to be like him…” Adam whispered sullenly, voice low and filled with bitterness. His sad eyes refused Ronan’s attempts to meet them.

“Don’t even go there,” Ronan said sliding his hand from Adam’s wrist to his palm. “This-” He used his free hand to gesture to the bruises he knew very well existed. “This wasn’t you, Parrish. It was a literal  _ demon.  _ You’re nothing like that asshole.”

Adam didn’t seem to acknowledge this.

“I should have been able to stop it. But I  _ couldn’t _ . It was like it was honing in on this part of  _ him _ in me. I-” His voice faltered as he drew his lips into a thin line. “ _ I could have killed you, Ronan. _ ” He whispered the last part and closed his eyes shut tightly.

“Hey,” Ronan said, giving Adam’s hand a light squeeze. “You didn’t kill me. It’ll take a lot more than that to get rid of me,” He smirked. “And you  _ did  _ stop it, remember?”

“After,” Adam’s eyes were still closed tight. Ronan studied the way his pale eyelashes rested against his cheeks. “I stopped it  _ after _ . If Blue and Gansey weren’t there, I-”

“‘If’ this and ‘if’ that,” Ronan sighed. “What matters is what  _ actually  _ happened.”

 

Adam grew quiet as he slowly reopened his eyes. Still, he kept them averted.

The only sound in the room was their breathing and the soft sound of crickets coming from outside.

 

“Why didn’t you try to stop me?” He finally asked, voice quiet. His eyes focused sharply on a point in the room away from Ronan. “Why didn’t you  _ defend  _ yourself?”

 

Ronan sighed as another long silence fell over them.

It was true that he was no stranger to fighting. He’d fought people for far less than actually trying to strangle him to death. However- the key difference was that none of the people he fought were  _ Adam.  _

He wasn’t quite sure how to answer that.

Ronan never lied. However, he wasn’t always the best at expressing himself verbally either.

 

How could you just say  _ ‘I refuse to be the cause of one of your bruises’  _ or even  _ ‘I would rather literally die than actually hurt you because I love you, you absolute dumbass’? _

Neither of these sentences felt like they could make it out of his mouth in one piece.

He had to settle on a simpler answer and hope Adam would be able to decipher the rest.

“I can’t hurt you,” He finally murmured after what felt like either several minutes or an eternity.

Like with Cabeswater, his perception of time seemed altered in the presence of Adam.

 

Adam finally met his gaze.

Ronan felt the same as he did the night before he had kissed Adam for the first time. Like there was a violent storm occurring within him. His heart hammering against his own ribcage like a bird trying to break free.

He could  _ feel  _ Adam’s analytical gaze boring into him, knowing that nothing went unseen by those watchful eyes.

However, when he finally gathered the courage to look back and figure out Adam’s expression, he was shocked to see a single tear rolling down a pale cheek.

The tear looked unfamiliar on Adam’s face.

Adam never cried. 

At least not in front of anyone.

 

“Adam?” Ronan asked, cautiously.

Adam opened his mouth as if to speak, but a quiet strangled sob came out instead.

Adam seemed just as startled by his own noise as Ronan was.

The tears continued to fall like raindrops.

It was like a dam had finally broken after being pushed to its limits for years.

  
Ronan reached out on instinct and gathered Adam’s crumpled form into his chest, his body limp like a ragdoll. Adam heaved out another ragged breath that sounded painful. The warm breath ghosted across Ronan’s bare chest sending goosebumps.

Neither of them said anything as Ronan gently traced shapes into Adam’s back.

He could feel the tears sliding off of his chest as he shook in his arms.

 

“I’m sorry,” Adam mumbled after a moment, lips brushing Ronan’s skin and sending shivers down his spine. “I’m so sorry.”

Ronan shushed him, tracing the outline of a large raven over Adam’s shoulder blades.

While Adam was far from a frail creature- the current moment in itself felt fragile and vulnerable. Ronan was terrified he would screw something up. 

It was like he was a bull being offered a piece of fine china to care for. 

Like he was being offered another secret, delicate as wings on a butterfly.

His heart was caught in between aching for Adam and stumbling over a beat every time Adam's damp eyelashes fluttered against his skin.

 

Ronan tried to think of what Aurora would do whenever the boys had cried in the past. He recalled waking up from nightmares, more real than anything a small child should ever have to face, and stumbling awkwardly into his parents bedroom.

His mother was always kind, no matter what obscure hour he rose at, so he’d go to her side of the bed first. She would smile a small smile, sleepiness still weighing down her eyelids, as she scooped him into her arms.

Softly, she would begin to hum a tune.

Something light and whimsical. A melody that he’d always imagined would look like fireflies and stars if it was something you could see. Something straight out of a dream.

More literal than not, he supposed.

 

Recalling the tune, and his mother’s patient face, he began to hum along with the memory. 

Adam’s breathing slowed down, the calming effects of the song already working its way through to him.

He could feel the vibrations within his own chest as Adam listened.

They laid there in peace for what was either several minutes or an eternity.

Again, time had no place here.

 

Adam had seemed to calm down significantly as Ronan continued to hum.

However, he felt a smirk slowly creeping its way to the side of his mouth as the gentle melody began to evolve into a new song.

Adam began to squirm.

“Squash one...squash two-”

“ _ Ronan!”  _ He chastised, breaking through the layer of calm that had settled over them. Although Ronan could feel him smiling into his chest. 

Adam’s shoulders were shaking again, but this time from silent chuckles.

Ronan relaxed in relief.

“Squash three…” He continued in a soft voice, drawing it out like a lullaby.

Adam’s hand immediately shot up to cover Ronan’s mouth.

“You asshole” He said fondly. He was smiling- his eyes tired and swollen.

“Excuse  _ me.  _ I thought you’d like the lullaby remix,” He mumbled into Adam’s hand.

He still didn’t remove his palm.

Ronan licked it.

Adam yanked his hand back and plopped his head back down on the pillow as he absently wiped the spit onto Ronan’s arm with a sigh.

Though it was definitely a noise of contentedness rather than exasperation so Ronan took that as a win.

“How do you do that?” Adam asked after a moment.

“Do what?”

“Change the tone of a situation so quickly?” 

“I’ve always been a natural prodigy.”

Adam smirked before leaning up and pressing his lips ever so gently to Ronan’s.

He tasted like salty tears.

“Thank you,” Adam murmured before pulling away and pressing another kiss to the bruise on Ronan’s neck.

He slowly, curled back up comfortably into Ronan’s chest.

“Hey-  _ forsan et haec olim meminisse iuvabit, _ “ Ronan whispered into Adam’s hair, reminding him once more.

 

They laid there waiting for sleep to take them away for what was either several minutes or an eternity. Ronan had decided that it didn’t matter, so long as Adam was there with him.

**Author's Note:**

>  _Post Tenebras Lux_ \-- After darkness, light


End file.
